Wish you Merry Christmas!
In the true spirit of Christmas let us explore if we can forgive at least one person today.
Is Forgiveness an act of giving or is it also receiving?
Did you ever hold back forgiving someone because you did not wish that person to be set free?
For the longest time I thought if I forgave someone then that person would have it too easy. He/she should suffer the way I have suffered. I wanted to take my anger out on the person and in return receive a heartfelt apology.
I learnt it the hard way! I was holding on to that anger and hurt and sadly I were the one who was burning. My perpetrator was unaware of my inner state. That person was carrying on with life as normal. Of course that made things worse for me as I desperately wanted a solution. But the solution had to be my way, as I wanted an apology before I could release my perpetrator. Little did I realize then that it was me who was trapped, it was me who needed to be set free.
We often trap ourselves in our emotions due to our beliefs and perceptions. We then don’t know how to release ourselves of that trap. This trap is set by our ‘Ego’ that thrives on victim and perpetrator roles. Our ego keeps playing and replaying our past and keeps on adding more spice and drama each time. As there has to be a story and drama for any action and reaction, we become puppets to our own story. We get consumed with emotions and go on a permanent roller coaster ride. But once we understand, that in order to be free there is no one to be forgiven but our self, we break the shackles of victimhood.
Forgiveness is not an act of charity for others. In fact, it is looking after our self responsibly. It is letting go of the drama that does disservice to us. However, it is important to remember the lesson from that experience. We then get wiser to handle similar situations in our life with out the unnecessary reaction.
‘Forgiving but not forgetting the lesson’, is the complete equation of giving and receiving. Giving freedom to our self and receiving wisdom from that experience helps us to become objective and empowered. Once we have that awareness, we can observe where we are stuck. We can observe why we are stuck and then release our self and move on. There is nothing we need to give or receive from others, for forgiveness is all internal work.